If I were a man, I'd know how to treat a woman

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There are some days when I think, as a woman: Why me?

It might be a bad-hair day, or maybe I just got a case of the blahs. I could be having a fat day and none of my clothes seem to fit, or maybe my feet hurt from walking in heels.

You know what I'm talking about, ladies -- girl stuff.

On those days, I wonder what I'd be like if I were a man. How would I act? What would I do?

Don't get me wrong -- I am happy to be a woman. But since I found the idea rather curious, I decided to identify and write down all the things I'd do if I were a man.

If I were a man, I know I'd be sensitive and considerate. I would take out the trash, cut the grass, do the laundry, cook and clean, and even make sure that I had a date night with my significant other.

Yes, I think I'd be a very good man.

I would tell all my guy friends important information. For example, I'd school them about how women really feel about men forgetting birthdays and anniversaries and important holidays like Mother's Day and Valentine's Day. The truth is ... if you forget, fellas, it is not going to be a sunny day.

In fact, if I were a man, I would never argue with my wife or girlfriend because, truth be told, women are almost always right. I'm sure that would be the case, even if I were a man.

If I were a man, I would always let her hold the remote and even rub her back or feet whenever she asked.

If I were a man I'd spend time doing something meaningful, too. I would mentor young boys so that they would know what it's truly like to be a man.

If I were a man I would make sure that I told women every day that they are beautiful queens and should be treated as such.

Now, granted, there are some down sides to being a man, I'm sure. I mean, I'd have to belch and watch sports all day on Sundays, but I suppose I could get used to it.

If I were a man, I would rally all the men in my man club to support an additional holiday called Women's Day. That way, all of us men could show our appreciation for their elegance, grace and beauty.

OK, seriously, I love being a woman, but fellas, you might want to work on that holiday next time you're in the doghouse.


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