Young family is Georgia player's priority

ATHENS, Ga. --- There are plenty of ways a college football player can measure the five years of his campus career.

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Marcus holds his fourteen-month old daughter, Samira.

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Marcus Washington is a senior defensive end at the University of Georgia.

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Marcus Jr. Washington, 5, plays a video game while his mom Selecia, dad Marcus and sister Samira, 14 months, watch.

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Samira Washington, 14 months, is dressed in the morning by her mom Selecia Washington in their Athens home.

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Burke County graduates Marcus and Selecia Washington consider Georgia football part of their family. "To him, this is his family," Selecia said of 5-year-old Marcus Jr. "He doesn't see Knowshon (Moreno) or (Matthew) Stafford on TV as NFL players. He sees them as his uncles."

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Some think of wins, titles, bowls, stats and starts. For others there are friends, parties, classes and degrees.

For Georgia's Marcus Washington, the easiest measure of his five years since he starred at Burke County High School stands about 4 feet tall and weighs 48 pounds. He answers to either M.J. or Marcus Jr. and has a 14-month-old little sister named Samira.

More than anything Mr. Washington has done on the field for the Bulldogs, his worth is measured in the family he and his wife, Selecia, have held together since they were high school seniors.

"It's been a long road but I wouldn't change any of it," Mr. Washington said. "I love Marcus Jr. He and his sister keep me going."

Five years ago Marcus and Selecia -- both multisport star athletes for the Bears -- were judged by some peers, teachers and even their student newspaper as "bad examples" after having a child as teenagers. Saturday at Sanford Stadium, the whole family in addition to Marcus' parents will stand in front of 90,000 fans before his final home game as something entirely different -- role models.

"I think he's a model on how to man up and take care of your family," Georgia coach Mark Richt said of Mr. Washington. "I'm proud of the decisions that he's made and he's a heck of a guy."

The ridicule

Oct. 15, 2004, was a game day at Burke County. The Bears faced neighboring rival Jefferson County that night. In the afternoon, Mr. Washington got called out of class to go to the hospital to become a father. He cried during the delivery.

"My coaches came to the hospital, saw my little boy, congratulated me and said 'You know we've got a game tonight,' " Mr. Washington remembers. "I felt bad leaving, but I went and played the game."

Mr. Washington hoped to honor his newborn son with something memorable on the field.

"I wasn't totally distracted, but I kind of had on my mind that I wanted to make a big play and do something extra special," he said.

He thought he had his chance by stripping the ball from a Jefferson County player. The runner, however, got loose up the sideline and scored in a 22-6 Jefferson County win.

"I did score a touchdown myself that game, so it wasn't all doom and gloom," he said.

But Mr. Washington's mind was more focused on his family. He and Selecia had known each other since fifth grade and started dating as high school sophomores. They had big plans, with him a prospect to become a Bulldog while she was being recruited by smaller colleges to play basketball. But during their junior year Selecia got pregnant. She continued playing basketball and running track, afraid to let anyone know.

"We were very scared," Selecia said. "We hid it from our parents for seven months. They were mad at first. They were thinking we messed up our chances of going to school."

That was certainly the sentiments of many at Burke County. Both of them good students, they still got stripped of some school superlatives. They were labeled bad examples in the school paper, The Beat . The judgments of peers stung Selecia the most.

"They were all doing the same things," she said. "But we decided it didn't really matter in the end."

Marcus turned a deaf ear to what any naysayers had to say about them. He chose to embrace the support from plenty others.

"I'm not going to lose any sleep over what anybody thinks," he said. "If people are going to think terrible things about you, that's just how some people are. No matter what I said or did I can't change their opinions. I'm going to do what I have to do."

What Mr. Washington knew he had to do was go to college. His parents insisted that it was the best thing for his family.

"I always told them they could do anything they wanted if they put their mind to it," said Mr. Washington's mom, Annette. "Go to college and get an education. That's taking care of your baby."

Mr. Washington accepted his scholarship offer to play for Georgia.

"Coming to college was a necessity to make a better life for Marcus Jr.," he said.

The differences

Mr. Washington's college experience could never be like that of his teammates. There would be no Thirsty Thursdays or nights hanging out in downtown Athens with friends. He went home to his family every night.

"They party; we don't," Selecia said of their lifestyle differences. "They go out; we don't. They have relationship issues; we don't."

"It's a growing process for me and my wife," said Mr. Washington, who married Selecia at the Athens courthouse in 2007. "I had to mature a lot faster than a lot of others because once you bring another human being into the world it's no longer about you. It's about them and making sure they're taken care of and have food to eat and clothes on their backs and a nice play to stay."

At times that has meant getting up early in the morning to work part time as a floor technician at St. Mary's Hospital before going to classes, team lunch, meetings and afternoon practice. On days when he has study hall, he might be gone until 10 p.m.

"The biggest thing is time," he said. "You've got to give your kids time and your wife time. A lot of my time is taken up with football and work and school, so it seems like sometimes there's not enough hours in the day to get it all done."

But he has, and his teammates admire him for it.

"It's unbelievable when you think of what he goes through being a family man while other guys are out partying," said fellow linebacker Rennie Curran, who has leaned on Mr. Washington for advice since his own daughter, Eleana, was born last year.

Mr. Washington's coaches are equally impressed with what he has done to keep himself on track to get his degree in residential housing in December.

"I really admire him for a lot of reasons," Mr. Richt said. "A lot of times when a young man finds himself in a situation that he's in, a lot of guys run. They don't want to stand up and take care of that. He's done more than just stand up. He's married, has two kids and been a wonderful father and husband. And he's doing all that and still playing football, which is such a tough, tough thing to do. But he's never backed down from it and he's grown tremendously through it."

The very idea of running from his parental responsibility is anathema to Mr. Washington.

"Some people run, but that's a selfish move in my opinion to take off on a child," he said. "The child didn't ask to be here. You made those decisions."

Mr. Washington never considered adhering to the stereotype of absentee fatherhood. He comes from a two-parent home in Keysville and would provide the same for his children.

"Being a young African-American male, most people don't expect too much from us when it comes to things like that," Mr. Curran said. "It would be so easy for him to do the opposite and not be a man and not stand by his kids. A lot of guys leave and don't see their kids. He's definitely not a statistic. He totally defies that. He's somebody that we can look to as how to be a man, no matter how young you are."

Mr. Washington has gotten used to hearing that sort of admiration from his teammates. He and his wife have become peer advisers, counseling many players and their girlfriends about everything from relationships to raising children.

"Just looking at him being with his family gives me hope that I can do the same and be a good man to my family," Mr. Curran said.

The support

Georgia football has been the Washingtons' family for five years now. His wife and kids are ubiquitous around the Bulldogs' facilities. They go on play dates with the coaches' children. Marcus Jr. calls many of the players "uncle."

"To him, this is his family," Selecia said. "He doesn't see Knowshon (Moreno) or (Matthew) Stafford on TV as NFL players. He sees them as his uncles."

"It's an experience that hopefully he will never forget," Mr. Washington said. "It's not an experience many kids will ever get. He gets to hang out with the Georgia Bulldogs every day."

It has been a comfortable nest for a young family trying to juggle so many things. Players volunteer to watch the kids at times. A.J. Harmon hung out with them at Disney World during last year's bowl trip to Orlando. Some come to their townhouse and join in the family video games.

"Uncle Byrd played me in Wii Resort," Marcus Jr. said of former Bulldog C.J. Byrd, of North Augusta. "I won."

That cocoon will soon be gone. Mr. Washington's on-field career hasn't been what he expected since a knee injury derailed him all of 2008 after he had risen into a starting role the season before. Playing time has been more limited since he returned and switched to linebacker.

"It's kind of hard to take a step back when you've got such great players coming through this program," Mr. Washington said. "Guys already right on your heels will pass you. I haven't been playing a ton. That's not what I want, but I guess I just have to work harder to get more playing time on the field."

He knows that whatever bowl trip the Bulldogs take this year might be his last in pads. He hopes an NFL team might give him a chance to prove himself, but he's realistic about his options.

Selecia earned her associate's degree from Athens Tech and studies business management in an online program. Mr. Washington will be ready to put to use the degree he came to Georgia to get.

"At the end of the day I've got to get a career to help me raise my family," he said.

Reach Scott Michaux at (706) 823-3219 or scott.michaux@augustachronicle.com.