I want a divorce from the liberals

  • Follow Letters

American liberals, leftists, social progressives, socialists, Marxists and Obama supporters, et al.: We have stuck together since the late 1950s, but the whole of this latest election process has made me realize that I want a divorce. ...

Here is a model separation agreement: Our two groups can equitably divide up the country by land mass, each taking a portion. That will be the difficult part, but I am sure our two sides can come to a friendly agreement. After that, it should be relatively easy! Our respective representatives can effortlessly divide other assets since both sides have such distinct and disparate tastes.

We don't like redistributive taxes, so you can keep them. You are welcome to the liberal judges and the American Civil Liberties Union. Since you hate guns and war, we'll take our firearms, the cops, the National Rifle Association and the military. You can keep Oprah Winfrey, Michael Moore and Rosie O'Donnell. We'll keep the capitalism, greedy corporations, pharmaceutical companies, Wal-Mart and Wall Street. You can have your beloved homeless, homeboys, hippies and illegal aliens. We'll keep the hot Alaskan hockey moms, greedy CEOs and rednecks. We'll keep the Bibles and give you NBC and Hollywood. You can make nice with Iran and the Palestinians, and we'll retain the right to invade and hammer places that threaten us. You can have the peaceniks and war protesters. When our allies or our way of life are under assault, we'll help provide them security. ...

You can give everyone health care if you can find any practicing doctors. We'll continue to believe health care is a luxury and not a right.

We'll keep The Battle Hymn of the Republic and the National Anthem. I'm sure you'll be happy to substitute Imagine, I'd Like to Teach the World to Sing, Kum Ba Ya or We Are the World . We'll practice trickle-down economics, and you can give trickle-up poverty your best shot.

Since it often so offends you, we'll keep our history, our name, our flag and our God!

Bo Slendak

Augusta

Comments (222) Add comment
ADVISORY: Users are solely responsible for opinions they post here and for following agreed-upon rules of civility. Posts and comments do not reflect the views of this site. Posts and comments are automatically checked for inappropriate language, but readers might find some comments offensive or inaccurate. If you believe a comment violates our rules, click the "Flag as offensive" link below the comment.
Goober
0
Points
Goober 03/05/09 - 04:12 am
0
0
Bo - Outstanding! Where do I

Bo - Outstanding! Where do I sign up?

jebko
0
Points
jebko 03/05/09 - 04:55 am
0
0
Let them keep the abortion

Let them keep the abortion clincs too... they will eventually kill themselves out! And their stance on gay marriage will assure no reproduction!

Nammy
2
Points
Nammy 03/05/09 - 05:49 am
0
0
Bravo!!! Damn....

Bravo!!! Damn....

patriciathomas
42
Points
patriciathomas 03/05/09 - 06:49 am
0
0
LOL Bo. Wonderful

LOL Bo. Wonderful perspective. It'd be like having a festering boil lanced from our lives...Unfortunately, the wacky left also likes sharing the misery of poor decision making, it's their right. And, who will support all of the subsidy programs with this division?

GACopperhead
6
Points
GACopperhead 03/05/09 - 07:07 am
0
0
idiots!

idiots!

dashiel
176
Points
dashiel 03/05/09 - 07:29 am
0
0
But GAC you have to admit it

But GAC you have to admit it IS a bad match, one of those awful marriages spreadeagle and all you can do is bite your tongue rather than take sides. They used to tolerate one another, but they've been at one another's throats ever since they went to see marriage counselor Rove. For the kids' sake, I'm just glad these lockhorns had that prenup.

patriciathomas
42
Points
patriciathomas 03/05/09 - 07:36 am
0
0
dashiel, no comment? just

dashiel, no comment? just blather? At least GaC took a stand. There's no room for a twisted attempt here.

southern2
5454
Points
southern2 03/05/09 - 07:37 am
0
0
Thanks Bo...I was beginning

Thanks Bo...I was beginning to think I was the last one standing! All we need is Davis, Lee, and Jackson style leadership.

TechLover
15
Points
TechLover 03/05/09 - 07:41 am
0
0
Bo: Those on the right are

Bo: Those on the right are bad winners and even worse losers. As the right wing posters have been so happy to remind anyone who complained when W was in charge- You can leave anytime you want. Delta is ready when you are. We'll stay here where decisions are made by free elections. We'll complain when we are against policies and support those with which we agree. You see Bo, that's America, Sorry you hate it so bad. Start packing.

CH
0
Points
CH 03/05/09 - 07:48 am
0
0
TECH, I made the same post as

TECH, I made the same post as you in 2002. Guess what? Things change...and change is coming baby, and not the kind you want. Washington is going to see a lot of moving vans after the 2010 elections. And you're right...that's America. God bless it!

44mag
0
Points
44mag 03/05/09 - 08:01 am
0
0
GAC, I presume that's an

GAC, I presume that's an indication you're contesting? Afraid you support check will get cut?

patriciathomas
42
Points
patriciathomas 03/05/09 - 08:10 am
0
0
Three lefties have responded.

Three lefties have responded. GaC and two tap dancers. We don't always agree GaC, but you never operate from a testicle free zone.

patriciathomas
42
Points
patriciathomas 03/05/09 - 08:20 am
0
0
TechLover, back on subject,

TechLover, back on subject, Bo didn't say he wanted to leave this country, quite the contrary. He just wanted the lefties to assume the responsibilities of liberalism and stop sharing those benefits with responsible Americans and he offered a situation where the left wouldn't have to deal with conservative policies. Every body gets to stay and enjoy the attributes they espouse.

dashiel
176
Points
dashiel 03/05/09 - 08:21 am
0
0
Pat, your constant

Pat, your constant buttonholing about the differences between Republicans and conservatives also grows tiresome. Most conservatives I know are good, honest, decent Americans who pay what taxes they must and who serve their country honorably when asked to do so. Unfortunately, they have no originality whatsoever, and once they appropriate what they sincerely believe to be an idea, they will latch on and chew it into dust. An original idea from a conservative is as rare as spontaneous human combustion.

JackRyan
0
Points
JackRyan 03/05/09 - 08:28 am
0
0
Dash, you are the pot calling

Dash, you are the pot calling the kettle black, are you not?

patriciathomas
42
Points
patriciathomas 03/05/09 - 08:34 am
0
0
dashiel, you're right.

dashiel, you're right. There's something to be said for originality, if it involves improvement. If, on the other hand, it's a detrimental idea, NOT changing is the right way to contend with it. Conservatism equates to stability with an opportunity for growth when the situation is presented. Originality for the sake of avoiding tiresomeness lacks a sufficient basis for change. There are some absolutes and conservatives allow themselves to realize this. I believe it's called the maturity of wisdom, or maybe, the wisdom of maturity.

dashiel
176
Points
dashiel 03/05/09 - 08:58 am
0
0
Thank you Pat, well said as

Thank you Pat, well said as usual, and I respect you more. I recall when many oldtime Democrats around here (and throughout the South) first joined up with the Republicans. Their motto was: "I didn't leave my party; my party left me." The last few years must have been de-ja vu all over again.

TechLover
15
Points
TechLover 03/05/09 - 08:58 am
0
0
CH:We'll see. That's the way

CH:We'll see. That's the way it works. The house gets re-elected every two so that's always (theoretically) up for grabs. There are 36 Senate seats up for election with 17 safe or leaning Dem and 14 safe or leaning Rep which leaves only 5 as tossups, Fla, Ohio, Missouri,New Hampshire, and Kentucky al of which could all go Dem. One of the safe Rep seats is Arlen Specter of Pa who isn't exactly a consistent Rep vote.

donnymack
1
Points
donnymack 03/05/09 - 09:06 am
0
0
I think that it is a terrific

I think that it is a terrific idea,sort of like the War Between the States,look how that turned out. The United States of America would be reduced to 43 States and the Intellegent Southern States would make up the rest of the territory. Conseravatives got us where we are even though they won't admit it,so they should have their own bloc. I don't believe they would last 5 years.

dashiel
176
Points
dashiel 03/05/09 - 09:07 am
0
0
Thank you for remembering,

Thank you for remembering, Retired Army! Did you know that the most popular event at the conference was a job fair for newly-unemployed conservatives? But no one woud dare call that an economic indicator, naw, we're just in a little temporary economic slump. While on Wall Street they're still listening for that dead-cat bump.

femacamper
0
Points
femacamper 03/05/09 - 09:11 am
0
0
I see Slendak can use the

I see Slendak can use the internet, and no doubt thinks he created this piece. It's been knocking around for about three weeks. Nice try at being clever, but even Augusta isn't this slow.

jack234
719
Points
jack234 03/05/09 - 09:12 am
0
0
Sounds like a good deal to

Sounds like a good deal to me, since you don't ask for much. HELLO! HELLO!

dashiel
176
Points
dashiel 03/05/09 - 09:24 am
0
0
femacamper, defense rests.

femacamper, defense rests.

mad_max
0
Points
mad_max 03/05/09 - 09:30 am
0
0
Bo I agree wholeheartedly. We

Bo I agree wholeheartedly. We are like a married couple who have grown to hate each other and we just need to get apart. Any court in the land would grant us a divorce based on irreconciable differences. We were married for a long time and for a while we tolerated each other because most people were middle of the road and most politicians talked liberal or conservative but actually governed from the middle. Now the radical liberals are trying to change our lives, the way we live, and make this country something I do not want to be a part of. The people in power today hate our country and they see an opportunity to remake into the socialist welfare state they have always wanted. I too want a divorce before the marriage turns violent. I will not be "remade" by the messiah and his dark angel Pelosi.

teharper428
2
Points
teharper428 03/05/09 - 09:32 am
0
0
You won't be able to have the

You won't be able to have the police and military since you don't want to pay any taxes and both are funded by the government.
As a liberal, I believe we Americans are in this together. In the Constitution, "to promote the general Welfare" (Preamble), and "provide for the common Defense and promote the general Welfare of the United States" (Article I, Section 8, Taxing and Spending Clause), means that as a country we collectively pay "dues" for national defense, public safety (police & fire protection), laws that protect our property (civil law), physical well-being (criminal law). Without those "general welfare" protections it would not be a country where most would want to reside.

Georgiais1
0
Points
Georgiais1 03/05/09 - 09:33 am
0
0
Good LTE....This will sour

Good LTE....This will sour their stomachs.

truthteller
0
Points
truthteller 03/05/09 - 09:35 am
0
0
The divorce that's coming

The divorce that's coming will be within the Republican party between its more moderate elements and the right-wing fringe.

JackRyan
0
Points
JackRyan 03/05/09 - 09:36 am
0
0
harper, we won't need the

harper, we won't need the police--you will have all the entitlement crooks thieves and gangsta wannabes.

Rolling Eyes
245
Points
Rolling Eyes 03/05/09 - 09:42 am
0
0
teharper428, I think it's all

teharper428, I think it's all of the other "welfare" programs that responsible Americans object to. I notice no lefties are responding to this letter. A lot of good dancing though. I think this letter addresses the "collectively pay" concept you seem to like.

teharper428
2
Points
teharper428 03/05/09 - 09:44 am
0
0
Yeah, Georgia, it does sicken

Yeah, Georgia, it does sicken one to read a LTE like this, such hatred out there. I disagree with the right wingers, however, I don't hate anyone. We disagree with how this recession came to be, but in reality both sides contributed to it. Maybe we should stay together "for the sake of the kids."

Back to Top

Search Augusta jobs