Still squirreling away gas money?
By Bill Kirby| Columnist
Friday, January 16, 2009

Prediction is very difficult, especially if it's about the future.

-- Niels Bohr

Remember last fall when gas prices started falling like John McCain's White House hopes?

I asked you how low you expected regular gasoline to be by Christmas Day.

Well, the official AAA average price for the Aiken-Augusta area on Christmas Day was $1.55 a gallon. Most of your guesses were too high, but some were very close.

Tom Ford predicted $1.50. Rubey Reese, of Stapleton, Ga., thought it would be $1.59.

Milt Villemain, of North Augusta, pegged it at $1.57.

And Mary Augeri, of Aiken, guessed $1.56 a gallon, missing it by a penny.

Thank you all for guessing.

SQUIRREL REPORT: About a half-dozen of you have written asking advice on how to get squirrels OUT of your attics.

Speaking from personal experience, I say there are several methods, none of which I've found successful.

I called my father, who suggested baptizing the squirrels.

"That way," he said, "there's a good chance you'd only see them on Christmas and Easter."

Others are more sympathetic.

Jean Orth, of Aiken, sent this note and a photo. She writes: "You made me think of my time with squirrels on Valentine's Day two years ago. On our balcony railing there was a large red camellia, and I thought my husband had cut it and forgot to bring it in. I found out later when another red camellia appeared that they were put there by a squirrel. Their way of saying Happy Valentine's Day."

(Squirrels aren't as nice to me, Jean.)

HISTORY LESSON: MY Our Town Web blog on augustachronicle.com might amuse you this week with the story of Augusta's famous fire bell "Big Steve," and how a city's best-laid plans sometimes don't work out.

TODAY'S JOKE: Here's one shared by Seth Benson.

A woman goes to the doctor for her yearly physical. The nurse starts with certain basic items.

"How much do you weigh?" she asks.

"Well, 115," the woman says.

The nurse puts her on the scale, and it turns out her weight is 140.

Then the nurse asks, "Your height?"

"About 5-foot-8," the woman says.

The nurse checks and sees that she only measures 5-foot-5.

The nurse then takes the woman's blood pressure and tells her it is very high.

"Of course it's high!" the woman screams. "When I came in here I was tall and slender! Now I'm short and fat!"

Reach Bill Kirby at (706) 823-3344 or bill.kirby@augustachronicle.com.

From the Friday, January 16, 2009 edition of the Augusta Chronicle
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