Why, when I was your age ... Never mind

Breakfast is a notoriously difficult meal to serve with a flourish.

- Clement Freud

Mom is out of town this week, which leaves me, my son and the dog to fend for ourselves when mealtime rolls around.

Needless to say, we've been eating a lot of cereal. Well, not the dog, but the me and the 11-year-old.

Shredded wheat, Cheerios and raisin bran. My son likes to fortify the latter with extra scoops from a raisin box that I think we've been working on since the Clinton administration.

"Dad," he asks over dinner, "why are we only supposed to eat this stuff for breakfast, anyway?"

I tell him it's mostly a tradition started years ago by breakfast cereal companies.

"Why, when I was your age," I say slowly, "your great-grandmother would fix a breakfast slightly larger than what you ate for Thanksgiving. There was fried chicken and ham and eggs and toast and grits and potatoes and sausage and plates and plates of biscuits and molasses and syrup and gravy.

"Breakfast used to be a big deal meal," I said. "Now, it's a Pop-Tart."

He didn't respond but continued to crunch. As usual, I think I lost him at "When I was your age ..."

l

SPEAKING OF BACK THEN: Bill Wood points out these comparisons.

1981

1. Prince Charles got married.

2. Liverpool crowned soccer Champions of Europe.

3. Australia lost the Ashes tournament.

4. Pope died.

2005

1. Prince Charles got married.

2. Liverpool crowned soccer Champions of Europe.

3. Australia lost the Ashes tournament.

4. Pope died.

Lesson learned? Next time Charles gets married, someone warn the pope.

l

TODAY'S JOKE: Three sisters, ages 92, 94 and 96, live in a house together. One night the 96-year-old draws a bath. She puts her foot in and pauses. She yells to the other sisters, "Was I getting in or out of the bath?"

"I don't know," the 94-year-old yells back, "I'll come up and see."

She starts up the stairs and pauses to ask, "Was I going up the stairs or down?"

The 92-year-old is sitting at the kitchen table having tea listening to her sisters. She shakes her head and says, "I sure hope I never get that forgetful, knock on wood."

She then yells, "I'll come up and help both of you as soon as I see who's at the door."