It would make quite a reality series on ESPN - building a high school football program from scratch.
It could be called "Kicking off at Exit 1," featuring 25 teenage boys and their karaoke-singing, Elvis-impersonating head coach.
Filmed on locations at the startup school - which fills the abandoned Fox Creek Crossing casino adjacent to the fireworks store with the giant camera-toting monkey in front of it - and the makeshift miniature practice field behind Sweetwater Baptist Church, it might seem more sur-reality TV instead.
"You wouldn't believe it," coach Russell Schneider said.
Tonight it gets real. The Fox Creek Predators make their debut at 7 p.m. at Lions Field in North Augusta. A little more than a month ago, even Schnieder himself had a hard time envisioning it.
That was when Schneider started getting questions from the charter school's charter students who knew little or nothing about football.
Are we going to have practice every day? How many times do we play a week? Is this the side of the ball that we tackle on?
"I'd never heard these questions before," said Schneider, a former assistant coach at North Augusta High and Augusta Christian Academy, his alma mater. "But I thought, I guess this makes sense. They've never played and some never even watched it. Some were timid and some have openly said they were scared."
This is where and how Schneider chose to get back into coaching after a two-year hiatus. Risking complete failure as a first-time head coach was a chance he wasn't just willing but eager to take.
"I didn't know what I was getting into," he admitted. "A lot of assistants get to go be a head coach but the program is already established. But the opportunity to be the head coach for the first time AND start a brand new program ... every day is a new surprise. It's a 25-hour a day job right now, but it will get easier."
Considering that foundation, Schneider's mission statement for his Predator program
seems almost as absurd as the idea of him prowling the sidelines in his favorite Elvis suit.
"Our ultimate goal here is to build a little Lincoln County on this side of the river," Schneider said, referring to the Class A football powerhouse from Lincolnton that owns 12 state championships and made Larry Campbell the winningest head coach in Georgia history.
"If we make our goals too small, they're easy to get to. But if we make them real high we expect a lot out of our kids."
That said, Schneider knows it will take baby steps to build the program.
Right now Fox Creek doesn't even have a bus, much less a permanent school campus, building or athletic facilities. Carpooling players and equipment to and from everything is the toughest task.
Naturally, expectations for the immediate future are more restrained.
"I want it now but the reality is we have to be patient," Schneider said. "We want to be positive about every situation - good or bad."
That's why Fox Creek is looking at this entire 10-game season as "one big scrimmage." The school with about 200 students will transition into South Carolina Region 4-A in 2006.
"This year we just want the kids to enjoy football," Schneider said of a schedule that includes only two home games and a few junior varsity foes.
"Most of them have never played a high school football game so they have no idea what it's like to get under those Friday night lights."
Fox Creek football had about 30 kids - mostly freshmen and sophomores and not a single senior - come out in the summer before discipline and attrition pared the roster to 25. More students expressed a late interest, but the team voted that if you weren't in it at the start of summer you'd have to wait until next year.
"Little things like that people might not like," Schneider said, "but they understand this is going to be a first-class program and we're going to establish some order and structure to it."
With weight room equipment mostly donated by Omni Health and Fitness, the importance of strength training was immediately stressed. Then Schneider and his staff had to convince the players that playing with proper technique wasn't nearly as scary as they feared.
"In last two scrimmages, we finally built up enough confidence in them to go up and hit somebody as hard as they can and it doesn't hurt," he said.
Tonight they will put whatever they've learned on display against a school called Dawson Street - a team from LaGrange making the step up from eight-man football.
Any chance that Schneider - who runs a karaoke and DJ business as offshoots of his Elvis impersonating - will don his King's wig and sequined outfit as he stalks the sidelines? Footage of that would surely make it onto the SportsCenter airwaves.
"Absolutely no way," he said. "People know I'm an entertainer and like to have fun. But when it comes to football I want them to know I'm serious about that. I don't want to make a joke of it."
Reach Scott Michaux at (706) 823-3219 or scott.michaux@augustachronicle.com.