Originally created 08/12/05

Mothers, fathers of invention should take trip to Columbia

Inventions mirror our secret wishes.

- Charles Duell

I probably never invented anything important.

My peach-and-cottage-cheese sandwich failed to inspire much interest. One summer I dreamed up a night baseball game played by flashlight, which foundered after one too many players got whacked in the dark with the ball.

I guess the highlight of my Edisonian endeavors was a sixth-grade science fair that featured a miniature electric chair constructed of wood, nails and an old extension cord. I used it to "execute" hot dogs, much to the delight of my classmates.

Well, just because the mother of invention has passed me by, that's no reason for you to give up on your creative dreams. In fact, if you want to drive over to Columbia this weekend, you can show off your inventions at ETV Studios, 1101 George Rogers Blvd. Registration is open from 7 a.m. to 1 p.m.

South Carolina Education Television says it is joining with Bouncing Brain Productions to market a new reality TV show that allows inventors to gain exposure for their work, and they say everyone who makes it by 1 p.m. Saturday will be auditioned.

And although there's no mention of refreshments, if someone's hungry for hot dogs - I've got some ideas.


MORE POST CARDS: Will they never cease, you ask? Not yet. Vacationers Frank and Genie Spears send a card from Namibia, where they went on a safari at the Etosha National Park and saw the world's largest sand dunes. They also went to Capetown, South Africa, "where we went on a great white shark cage dive. For some reason, the sharks didn't want to eat Frank!"

Ashton Marcano of Martinez and Jean Hamilton of North Augusta are enjoying a shag event in Myrtle Beach.

Carolyn Wood, of Wrens, was visiting Oakland, Calif., and Freddie Suber and Janet Timmons Martin enjoyed a Fourth of July in Seoul, Korea.

Chuck, Cindi, Lacey and Wesley Oellerich made it to Vancouver, and Seattle.


TODAY'S JOKE: Here's one from Bill Wood. It seems several men were in the locker room of a golf club when a cell phone sitting on a bench started to ring. One of the men reached over and engaged the hands-free speaker function.

"Are you at the club?" a woman's voice asked.

"Yes," he answered, as everyone else listened.

"Well, I'm at the mall," she said, "and found a beautiful leather coat for $1,000. Can I buy it?"

"Sure," said the man.

"I also stopped by the Mercedes dealer and saw one I really like," the woman's voice said.

"How much?" asked the man sitting on the bench.

"About $90,000," the woman said.

"Sounds about right," the man said.

"I'll get it then!" the woman said.

"OK," said the man, who then hung up the phone.

The other men in the locker room stared. He looked up, noted their astonishment, and smiled as he asked, "Anyone know who this phone belongs to?"


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