Usually, the right word is one you make up yourself

The difference between the almost right word and the right word is the difference between lightning and the lightning bug.

- Mark Twain

I can't figure this out.

Time after time I'll turn on a TV show or movie in midprogram and discover it's at the very same scene that I saw the last time I turned it on in midprogram.

What do you call this coincidence?

What do you call this random synchronization?

I call it dj view.

Yep, I invent words, too.

Years ago, while covering a lackluster election campaign, I came to the conclusion that your basic American political terms no longer apply.

The national Democrats, I found, weren't really "liberals." They struck me as sort of smug, quick-tongued know-it-alls ready with a smirk and a quip. I thought it more accurate to call them "gliberals."

On the other hand, the Republicans I observed weren't really "conservatives." From what I could tell, they didn't conserve anything. They did, however, seem resolute in preserving their economic control on the stuff they already had.

I thought the term "preservatives" fit them more accurately.

That's our language for you - evolving, changing, growing. One year The Washington Post had a contest in which it asked readers to think up new words.

Here are some of the better ones.

Reintarnation: Coming back to life as a hillbilly.

Giraffiti: Vandalism painted very, very high.

Sarchasm: The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn't get it.

Abdicate: To give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach.

Esplanade: To attempt an explanation while drunk.

Flabbergasted: Appalled over how much weight you have gained.

Negligent: Describes a condition in which you absentmindedly answer the door in your nightie.

Coffee : A person who is coughed upon.

Balderdash: A rapidly receding hairline.

Rectitude: The formal, dignified demeanor assumed by a proctologist immediately before he examines you.

Intaxication: The annual euphoria at getting a tax refund, which lasts until you realize it was your money to begin with.

Sounds like dj view to me.