Tips on end-of-year tipping

NEW YORK - Todd Happer is making a list, checking it twice. It's not a roster of gifts for family and friends, but rather that annual painful run-down of who to tip this holiday season.

For Happer, who lives in a high-rise apartment building in New York City, that group includes a small army of concierges, handymen, porters and even dry cleaners. By the time he's done, he'll be out at least $300 - some of it to people whose names he doesn't even know.

"I'm glad the one cranky doorman I didn't like is gone. I really didn't want to have to give him anything," says Happer, vice president at Natural History magazine.

For many, holiday tipping is an unwelcome necessity fraught with confusion over how much to give and fear that under-tipping could result in bad doggie daycare, dings in the car, or cold shoulders in the year to come.

A number of experts, including grand dame of etiquette Emily Post, suggest there's no hard-and-fast rule for how much to give. Rather, the amount depends on the quality of the service, your relationship with the service-provider, the local customs, and your budget.

In a recent survey of holiday tipping, Consumer Reports found that child-care providers were among the most often tipped, indicating that people tend to reward those who make the biggest difference in their lives.

Consumer Reports, which polled 3,100 subscribers, also found that people tend to tip those whose services they use frequently, from manicurists to newspaper carriers, and those who go out of their way, such as a building super who installs light bulbs for you or unplugs your toilet.

"The list of people that can receive tips at the holidays are growing as people use more service providers," says Laura Washington, an associate editor at Consumer Reports.

The newest profession to make the list: the water-delivery person, Washington says. People like to tip "someone who hauls the 5-gallon bottle onto the fountain," she says. "If you've got someone who's really making the extra effort, why not?"

While it's a hassle, people say they really do want to take care of workers whose meager salaries are fattened by tips. Happer says tipping 10 or more building staff is a pain but "they are all nice people, who try really hard, and I'm sure they're getting ripped off by the building management... so I keep doing it."

Here's a breakdown of the top areas of tipping, and what to keep in mind:

- Child care. For day-care providers, give tips of $25 to $70 each, plus a small gift from your child, according to the Emily Post Institute. A regular baby sitter should get a tip worth one evening's pay, and an au pair a tip worth one week's pay - both combined with a small gift from your child. Teachers are trickier (or easier, depending on your perspective) because cash isn't appropriate. Gift ideas include a gift certificate for a coffee shop or book store, according to Emily Post. But teachers don't want gifts of food, so forget the home-baked cookies, Consumer Reports found.

- Apartment building. Check what your neighbors are doing. For doormen, tips can fall in the range of $25 to $100, depending on how fancy the building, according to Original Tipping Page, a tipping Web site. Take into consideration how nice they are to you, whether you get lots of deliveries, if they have actually opened the door for you. Tips for handymen and custodians generally fall in the range of $20 to $30 each; tips for superintendents run $30 to $100, according to Original Tipping.

- People who provide a regular service, such as the cleaning woman, the dog walker, the personal fitness trainer, or the guy who washes your car or mows your lawn. The simple rule of thumb is give a tip that's equal to the cost of one visit or treatment, according to Banknote.com.

- People who provide a brief but regular service, such as the newspaper carrier, the parking attendant or the trash collector. Tips generally fall in the range of $10 to $30, the experts say. Your mail carrier isn't supposed to take tips but the U.S. Postal Service makes an exception for the holidays (although gifts should be $20 or less).

A growing trend is for people to forget the holiday tip for barbers, hairdressers and others who normally receive tips at the time of service, says Washington of Consumer Reports. At the same time, gifts for people who provide elder care are increasing, she says.

And while it may seem obvious, keep in mind that "holiday tipping is about showing your appreciation for a good service that you received throughout the year," she says. If your budget already is pushed to the limit, at least write a thank-you note, she says.