Originally created 02/25/03

Girl seems obsessed with boyfriend's income



THIS WEEK'S PROBLEM: My boyfriend is a 20-year-old high school dropout and makes a living as a car mechanic. Last week he asked me to marry him, but I don't want to tie myself down yet. I love him, but I want to go to college and think I would be more comfortable marrying someone who would be more able to pay the bills. I don't want to lose him, and this seems to complicate things more than being girlfriend and boyfriend. I love him and don't want to lose him. - 18-year-old Augusta girl.

Here's what you had to say:

  • You can do better than that anyway.
  • I think instead of telling us about it, you should be talking to your boyfriend to see what he says about it. Maybe he can go to college with you and get a better job than a car mechanic.
  • I think that you should follow your heart. Go to college and everything and tell him to get back in school or go to technical college or get his GED, so he can get a better job. But don't run off and get married, you may meet someone else sometime in the future.
  • Tell your boyfriend he needs to go back to school because he's not going to make it doing that job.
  • Don't worry about how much money he makes. If you love him, that shouldn't matter.
  • Xtreme reporter Jennifer Hilliard says: You say you love this guy but all I really hear you saying is that you're concerned with material things, like how much money he makes. If you really love him that wouldn't be an issue.

    It's unfortunate that he hasn't finished school, but you knew that before you started dating. You also knew that he is a car mechanic before you started the relationship. And by the way, some car mechanics make really good money. More than some people with a college education.

    That said, you're only 18. You shouldn't be considering marriage at such an early age, especially since you're about to leave for college.

    Someone once told me that taking a boyfriend to college is like taking sand to a beach, meaning that there are so many interesting guys out there. Maybe what both of you need is some time apart - for you to consider the commitment that marriage means, and for him to consider going back to school.

    NEXT WEEK'S PROBLEM

    I just found out that my boyfriend is gay. He's been talking to my other friend who's gay. I found out that they had sex. What can I do?

    Do you have any advice for this 15-year-old Augusta girl? Call the Advice Line at 442-4444 and press 8614. You'll have one minute to answer.

    Got a problem? Call 442-4444 and press 8613. You'll have one minute to give us your situation. Please speak clearly and state your age and the town you live in.

    You also can e-mail your problems to jennifer.hilliard@ augustachronicle.com. Put "Advice Line" in the subject line. All e-mail addresses will be kept confidential. Questions may be condensed for space.