I am not young enough to know everything.
- Oscar Wilde
Clyde Lester, Richmond County's county agent "emeritus," calls this fall weather "weird."
I can't argue.
What have we had, two measurable rainfalls since football season began?
Now football season is pretty much over and the weather continues as dry as a preacher convention.
Of course, that didn't stop a number of my neighbors from spending much of the weekend putting up lights and wreaths and assorted red-and-green decorations.
At least they're trying.
But while they might be humming It's Beginning To Look A Lot Like Christmas, it sure doesn't feel like Christmas - more like Halloween.
I guess this is Nature's trick before the treat.
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MAILBAG: In the Christmas mood is Helen Welch of Thomson, who describes herself as "an avid reader." She sends holiday greetings from Myrtle Beach and writes: "This is my third visit during 2001! Our Augusta Chronicle is by far the most informative newspaper I've ever read. I do like shopping at Myrtle Beach, though. I'll tell Santa about all the great staff at the Chronicle!"
(Thank you, Helen!)
Traveling a bit farther away are Don and Mabel Plueger, who send greetings from Arizona. They write, "We are visiting snowbird residents from Nebraska."
(Probably not much like Christmas there, either.)
Closer to a Winter Wonderland are Carl and Polly Schutte of North Augusta, who send a postcard from Switzerland where they're checking out glaciers.
"Lots to see and do," they say.
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THOUGHT FOR THE DAY: It's God's responsibility to forgive Osama bin Laden. It's our responsibility to arrange the meeting.
* * *
TODAY'S JOKE: Here's an observation passed along by Richard Arnold (and several others).
While both male and female reindeer grow antlers in the summer each year, male reindeer drop their antlers at the beginning of winter, usually late November to mid-December.
Female reindeer retain their antlers until after they give birth in the spring. Therefore, according to every historical rendition depicting Santa's reindeer, every single one of them, from Rudolph to Blitzen, had to be a girl.
We should've known. Only women would be able to drag a fat man in a red velvet suit around the world in one night, and not get lost.
Reach Bill Kirby at (706) 823-3344 or firstname.lastname@example.org.
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