Originally created 10/31/00

Xtreme advice: Some suggest dumping fiance, others suggest not

I've been with this guy for a year. Recently we got engaged and have made plans for the future. I just found out that he cheated on me with a girl I go to school with. He says that he didn't mean to do it. He just wasn't in the right state of mind. Now, I love this guy with all my heart. What should I do? - 18-year-old Augusta girl

Here's what you had to say:

- Break up with him. He's not worth it.

- If he loved you he wouldn't have done it in the first place. Ask him why and talk to him. Find out why he did it and why he would hurt you. If he really loved you, he wouldn't hurt you.

- If you really love this guy, then it shouldn't really matter what he's done. You should just sit down and talk it out and then just go from there.

- I think you should dump him. Once you are a cheater you are always a cheater. No matter what, if a guy is not in his right mind or anything he's going to cheat no matter what.

- You need to cool out for a minute because y'all have been going for a year and you're already engaged. You should think about what you're doing and if this doesn't work out you need to go see a counselor to help you solve your problems with this guy if you love him that much.

- Ditch him. My question is, how often does he get in that state of mind?

- Think about it this way: If he truly loved you he would have never cheated on you in the beginning. I think you should find someone new and kick him to the curb. Find someone who truly loves you for you.

- I think that you should find someone else that really, truly loves you. I think he's just playing you and he just tried to get with you.

- I know you love this guy and all, but break up with him now. I know it's hard to let go. But sometimes you just have to. Look what he did to you. What makes you so sure he won't do it again?

- I think that you should forgive him because if you really love him, love overlooks a multitude of things. But if he fools you once, shame on him; if he fools you twice, shame on you. I think that you should just be aware of the situation.

- I think you should leave him alone because if he cheated on you once he'll do it again.

My best friend and I have been hanging around these two boys. She likes one, and I'm supposed to like the other. The thing is, I don't like the other one. Being that my friend is shy, I talk to her crush for her. Now I think I have feelings for her crush and that he has feelings for me. How do I handle this situation without hurting either friend's feelings?

Do you have any advice for this 14-year-old Augusta girl? Call the Advice Line at 442-4444 and press 8614. You'll have one minute to answer.

Got a problem? Call 442-4444 and press 8613. You'll have one minute to give us your situation. Please state your age and the town you live in.

You can also e-mail your problems to feature@augustachronicle.com. All e-mail addresses will be kept confidential.

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