Originally created 08/17/99

Communication best way to solve problem



THIS WEEK'S PROBLEM

"My mom shows favoritism toward my little sister. I asked her why she does it, and she says she doesn't show favoritism. But she buys her more things than me, and I don't think it's fair. What should I do?" -- 16-year-old girl, Augusta

YOUR ADVICE:

If you feel your mom is showing favoritism, tell her how you feel about her doing more for your sister than she's doing for you. And save up your money to try to buy your own things. Then you won't have to worry about it.

Let your mom know what's in your heart, but don't do it in anger. Writing a letter might be the best because you can think about what you want to say. You'll be less likely to leave out anything. Pick a time when you can be alone with your mom and give her the letter. Sit with her as she reads it. When she's done, she'll understand where you're coming from. Then you and your mom should work on ways for you to feel like you're getting your share of time and attention. And work on getting close to your sister; you don't want jealousy to creep in.

Xtreme reporter Emily Sollie's advice:

Your mom might buy your sister more things than she buys you, but that doesn't mean she loves her more. Maybe the things she's buying for your sister are less expensive, so she's spending the same amount of money on both of you.

Let your mom know how it makes you feel when she does things that you think are showing favoritism. Tell her if it hurts your feelings, or makes you feel like you're not as special, or whatever, and explain your side. Then try to understand her side of it too.

NEXT WEEK'S PROBLEM

"I have a boyfriend who's really sweet, but my mom won't let me go out with him because she doesn't want me to have a boyfriend yet."

Do you have any advice for this 14-year-old Augusta girl? Call the Advice Line at 442-4444 and press 8614. You'll have one minute to answer. Got a problem? Call 442-4444 and press 8613. You'll have one minute to give us your situation. Please state your age and the town you live in.