Originally created 08/31/97

The proper thing: Rudeness is never welcome



Dear Carson: You cannot believe my boss. He has very low selfesteem. He is constantly looking for ways to cut others and will lie to make his position prevail.

The big boss is his friend, and no worker has the courage to confront him. Any employee who has was told that it was no one else felt that way. What is the proper way to solve this problem? It is affecting our morale. - 33 Employees

Dear 33: My suggestion is that all 33 of you sign a petition stating your grievances against your supervisor. There is strength in numbers, and the big boss cannot say that any complainant is alone.

As for rudeness and putdowns, I saw a marquee off Washington Road in Augusta the other day. It reads, "Rudeness is a weak man's imitation of strength."

Dear Carson: I have two sons-in-law and one daughterin-law. Two of them call me "Mama Doe" and the other calls me "Mrs. Doe." I like being called "Mama Doe" and sign all cards and notes as such to the ones who call me that. How should I sign cards to the one who calls me "Mrs. Doe"? - Mama or Mrs.

Dear M or M: It sounds to me as if one of them is uncomfortable with the prefix "Mama" in front of your name.

If I were you I would sign the letters and cards with whatever name you would like him to call you. My other suggestion is that you tell him that calling you "Mrs. X" is too formal and suggest that he call you by a friendlier name, perhaps your first name.

By all means discuss it. Who knows, he may be waiting for you to tell him how you want him to address you.

Dear Carson: How do you feel about notes written by one person but signed with two names (i.e. a husband and a wife).

It seems silly to me, since it is obvious that both people did not write the letter. Please express your opinion. - Literal Thinker

Dear Literal: I, too, prefer the signature of the letter writer, only. For instance, when writing a thank-you note, rather than signing it "Jane and John," simply write , "John joins me in thanking you for having us to the beach last weekend."

Have a question on etiquette? You can ask Carson Elliott by calling INFOLINE at 442-4444. Press 4422 and leave your message. You can write to Ask Carson, The Augusta Chronicle, P.O. Box 1928, Augusta, Ga. 30913-1928. Send E-mail to Carson at AskCarson@poseidon.net. Her Web address is: http://www.poseidon.net/Ask-Carson