While the Chinese calendar says it's Year of the Monkey, in Georgia it's apparently the Year of the Boar - more specifically, Hogzilla.
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Long after people forget about the weekly hurricanes of 2004 and the fact that Democrats once held public office in Georgia, the legend of the 1,000-pound, 12-foot-long wild hog is certain to live on.
When a hunting guide supposedly brought down the hairy heavyweight with his rifle over the summer near Alapaha, Ga., you could say it was the shot heard 'round the world.
Word of Hogzilla quickly spread over The Associated Press wires and the Internet, with the photo of the beast even winning the titles of "Most E-Mailed" and "Most Viewed" on Yahoo.com.
More than 200 newspapers and dozens of television and radio stations from Canada to Russia interviewed Ken Holyoak, owner of the plantation where the hog was killed about 180 miles southeast of Atlanta.
T-shirts showing the prodigious porker are hot sellers in south Georgia, and people regularly ask Hogzilla's slayer for his autograph. The town of Alapaha even honored the legend of Hogzilla with a weekend festival, which included a hog-calling contest, a greased-pig chase and a parade with a float featuring a life-size replica, including its fabled nine-inch-long tusks.
"I didn't know people would go that crazy over a hog," said Holyoak, about Hogzilla mania, which leads Georgia's Not Quite The Top Stories of 2004.
The fact remains that few mortals actually saw Hogzilla. The only proof is a photo taken by Holyoak showing the hunting guide dwarfed by the beast as it dangles from a rope over its eventual grave. Holyoak says Hogzilla was too old to butcher and too big to mount, so it was buried. A white cross now marks the spot.
As if anyone doubts the beast's existence, forensic scientists and a television crew recently unearthed the remains with plans to announce their findings in the spring on cable television's National Geographic Channel.
Stay tuned.
KIDS, MEET YOUR BABY GREAT-UNCLES
While many 59-year-olds are spoiling the grandkids and prepping for retirement, Frances Harris is getting ready again for motherhood.
The great-grandmother from rural Sylvester, Ga., is pregnant with twins and set to deliver this month.
The multiple birth would break the purported record set in November by a 56-year-old New York City mother of twins, who is believed to be the oldest American to have given birth to twins.
While that woman needed the help of fertility treatments, Harris did it the old-fashioned way - thanks to the help of her ex-husband, 60-year-old Raymond Harris. (The couple plans to remarry soon.)
Harris had her first child when she was only 15 years old, which means 44 years will separate her oldest from her youngest.
Even after factoring in her age, her pregnancy was even more shocking considering that Harris - a mother of five, grandmother of 14 and great-grandmother of six - had her tubes tied 33 years ago after the birth of her youngest child.
"They came untied," she explained, matter-of-factly.
BULLWINKLE'S BUDDIES BEWARE
Citing citizen complaints, the city of Washington declared war on squirrels by allowing residents to fire guns at the pesky furry rodents.
Shooting is not typically allowed within city limits, but extreme measures were necessary.
"I was hearing complaints about the squirrels every day, on the street, in the grocery store, everywhere," said squirrel victim and Police Chief Mike Davis, whose home was attacked by the critters, which chewed through electrical wires, defrosting a refrigerator and shorting out a computer.
The special hunting season within city limits was approved in October and allows property owners to shoot squirrels with a single-shot shotgun until Feb. 28.
Under state law, no more than 12 squirrels can be shot in a day. Of the 17 Washingtonians granted squirrel-shooting permits so far, several have reported bagging the daily limit, Davis said.
As for Davis, he also got a permit, but he hasn't had to use it because the squirrels seem to have disappeared from his property.
"They don't come out anymore," he said.
And for good reason.
CHICKENS GONE WILD
Some residents of Fitzgerald would love to open fire on the town's growing flock of wild chickens.
They say the birds are common chickens that crow loudly at all hours of the night, damage flower beds and leave messy droppings. However, the fowl's fanciers consider the birds prized descendants of wild jungle fowl brought over from Southeastern Asia in the 1960s.
While the mayor has appointed a panel to look into the problem, the state's top game official has pointed out that the birds are unprotected by state game laws and "may be taken at any time and by any means not otherwise prohibited."
The bad news for the bothered is that they can't shoot or poison the birds because gun play and toxins are outlawed within city limits. However, legal options are encouraged - such as trapping, destroying nests and eggs, and feeding the birds food that sterilizes them.
"You can't eliminate them, but you can cut down on the multiplication of them," Mayor Gerald Thompson said.
Sounds like a simple math problem.
THE MILLION-DOLLAR EXCUSE
It's my husband's fault.
Sound familiar? That's what a Porterdale woman told police when she was arrested for trying to pass off a fake $1 million bill at a Wal-Mart in Convington.
Alice Pike said she got the bill, from her estranged husband, who is a coin collector.
She said she thought it was real - the bill shows a picture of the Statue of Liberty - but it turns out the U.S. Treasury doesn't make $1 million bills.
"You can't keep up with the U.S. Treasury," Pike said from the Newton County Jail.
So true.
Regardless, police say Pike tried to use the funny money to buy $1,671 worth of merchandise - and even asked for change.
FORK OVER THE FORK, PLEASE
You know times are tough when the state's largest university is begging students to return forks, spoons, plates or bowls "borrowed" from the University of Georgia's dining halls.
The university loses about $5,000 in dinnerware each year to students with sticky fingers who apparently want more than ice cream when visiting the cafeteria.
To encourage the recovery of this stolen state property, boxes were placed this fall in the four dining halls on campus and an appeal was made to students to return missing items, no questions asked.
Thirty items - with a combined estimated value of $15 - were returned, said J. Michael Floyd, the department head of food services.
"The boxes probably served more as a preventive item. It brought awareness to our customers that this is inappropriate. This made it clear that this is not the cool thing to do."
In a year of budget cuts, the silverware roundup was not the only cost-saving measure implemented at a cash-strapped state school. Georgia Tech will no longer accept American Express, or any credit card for that matter, as payment for tuition, fees, housing or meal plans. Bucking the plastic will save Tech an estimated $1 million a year in credit card charges.
DUDE, YOU'RE ON FIRE TONIGHT
For one night, the Atlanta punk band Treephort was the hottest act in Flint, Mich.
About 20 minutes into a set at a downtown club, the group's lead guitarist dropped his pants, set his thong on fire, and then removed his burning underwear before scurrying around naked on stage. The group's bass player then also stripped.
The band was ordered off the stage because of the flames - not the nudity. The fire violated the venue's insurance policy and city rules against open flames in the building.
Treephort singer Lee Satterfield said the band's concerts routinely feature a member dousing a thong with hairspray and then igniting it with a lighter.
"We're professionals; we know what we're doing," he said.
Yes kids, leave the underwear burning and prancing in the nude to the professionals.
