Keep the family together

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I have seen moms and dads together raise their children as a family, with or without guns in their homes. The outcomes I’ve seen have produced overwhelmingly healthy, capable, balanced, resilient, self-reliant and self-supporting young adults who become responsible citizens you never hear about because they don’t get into or cause trouble (with or without guns).

I also have seen moms try to raise their children without a dad in the home. The outcomes I’ve seen have produced children who grow into adulthood barely educated, barely self-reliant and barely able to support themselves; suffering from a lack of ability to succeed in life on their own; and they are most often the ones we hear about in trouble (with and without guns).

Why won’t The Augusta Chronicle take the lead to publish story after story, day after day, week after week, month after month showing pointed examples of the above real-life situation that is causing problems around our city and our country every day?

Why won’t The Chronicle make the effort to drive this message home? Single-mother households are the root cause of much of the havoc we are suffering across all economic, social and racial lines – of children failing in school, children becoming increasingly violent, children having active sex lives, children being abused, childhood obesity and children ultimately growing into broken adults.

Moms and dads raising children as families would go further than anything else to straighten out many of the problems afflicting our country. How about the rest of you reading this? Why don’t you take the time and make efforts to help moms and dads stay together to raise their children as united families?

And for all the gun-control zealots out there: If you’d focus on helping moms and dads stay together to rear their children as families, that would reduce gun violence more than all the gun-control laws anyone could think up.

Steve R. Smith

Grovetown

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specsta
6592
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specsta 09/13/13 - 03:10 am
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7
The Blame Game - Again

Steve R. Smith wrote - "Single-mother households are the root cause of much of the havoc we are suffering across all economic, social and racial lines – of children failing in school, children becoming increasingly violent, children having active sex lives, children being abused, childhood obesity and children ultimately growing into broken adults."

Wow, this guy must really hate single mothers. Or maybe he hates single fathers. Or maybe he hates everybody that wasn't born with a silver spoon in their mouth, in a loving two-parent home, with a white picket fence and neighbors who wave hello every morning across the driveway.

Some people always love to have a scapegoat. Single mothers, the poor, the homeless, food stamp recipients, immigrants, low-wage workers, ethnic groups, those who must ride the bus or even folks who have the nerve to get sick and need a doctor. Sure, let's blame somebody else for society's ills.

But maybe - you should ask about the root causes of single-parent homes. Is it because 2 million US citizens are incarcerated, mostly males, for non-violent crimes? Is it because we fail to adequately address human reproduction issues with our children and teens, wrapping such knowledge in shame - to the point where they get their most pressing sexual questions answered by peers?

Is it because of economics, where joblessness and homelessness pushes young families apart? Is it the flawed family court system, where women are the usual recipients of physical custody of the children? Is it the 50% divorce rate in this country that contributes to single-parenthood? Are men so stressed and unable to provide security (financial and emotional) support for their children that they bail?

Yeah, it's pretty easy to blame single mothers for every bad thing in our society. It's convenient and provides an escape from looking at the real issues that affect families.

If someone were really concerned about single parenting, they would do everything in their power to educate children and teens in sexual matters, educate them in financial matters, educate them in relationships and how to build families, and would provide the financial and emotional support to do these things.

Otherwise, more mouths blaming single parents for all that is wrong in the world in just noise.

localguy55
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localguy55 09/13/13 - 07:58 am
6
2
Specsta, I think you are

Specsta,
I think you are taking this article out of context in that single moms(parents) are not the cause of so many problems accociated with delinquent kids, but a symptom. I myself have raised I child alone for decade and a half, and I wil tell you that it is the hardest thing an adult will ever do if done right. And then it does not all go as planned. Standing outside the daycare waiting for it to open because of needing to be at work early, having no support from the noncustodial parent. Not havng family support nearby. Coming home from work and then starting second-shift at home making dinner, baths, laundry, homework, then maybe an hour of me time before bed. Get up the next day and do it all over again. Yes, good single parenthood is not impossible, but it is very, very hard.
As for the causes, it not due to locking people up for crimes, or not teaching sex education in schools, or whether you were born with w silver spoon in your mouth. I believe it is because unweded pregency and divorce has been accepted as a normal thing. But doing the right thing is hard and in our society people have generally never experienced true hardships. Also, our society has accepted non-responsibility for personal behavior. Our government hands out food stamps, housing, free phones, and as a result, is partly responsible for creating a large underclass of nonproductive people in our society. It is only natural that people of no responsibility would perpetuate a condition of single parents with no support other than handouts from the government. Go to the more seedy parts of town, if you are brave, and observe what we as a society have accepted. It was created by the people we put in policital power and now we are making excuses for the condition, because telling the truth is not politically correct.

grouse
1635
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grouse 09/13/13 - 08:20 am
1
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A single mother reared a
Unpublished

A single mother reared a child who became a President of the United States. Whatever you think of him, he was certainly educated, able to support himself, and successful!

t3bledsoe
14291
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t3bledsoe 09/13/13 - 08:35 am
2
4
Quote from LTE

"I have seen moms and dads together raise their children as a family, with or without guns in their homes"

I understand the point of the two parent home, BUT what is up with the guns?

soapy_725
43757
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soapy_725 09/13/13 - 08:37 am
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The federal government is destroying the family. Deliberate.
Unpublished

The federal government is destroying the family. Deliberate.

soapy_725
43757
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soapy_725 09/13/13 - 08:38 am
1
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Every federal assistance program targets the Biblical Family.
Unpublished

Every federal assistance program targets the Biblical Family.

t3bledsoe
14291
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t3bledsoe 09/13/13 - 08:44 am
2
2
Quote from LTE

"Why won’t The Augusta Chronicle take the lead to publish story after story, day after day, week after week, month after month showing pointed examples of the above real-life situation that is causing problems around our city and our country every day"

I would say the Chronicle does report on these stories in the form of news. As long as people believe in, "live and let live", individual human nature will trend toward what we want. Quite often, and too often, people live their lives the way that makes them happy. Many times this does not include "responcibility"!

crkgrdn
2287
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crkgrdn 09/13/13 - 09:22 am
1
1
Charlie Brown said clearly

That's what it's all about.

deestafford
28615
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deestafford 09/13/13 - 09:26 am
3
1
Thanks to the letter writer for doing such a great job of

explaining perhaps the major contributor to the degradation of some parts of our society today.

I think what we need to define is what category of single parent we believe is the source of the problem. I'm not talking about widows or most who of those who are divorced. I talking about the unwed mothers who have children without marriage and multiple children from multiple fathers. This latter category accounts for almost 75% of the black community and about 25% of the white community.

Sadly, there are many like specta and the majority of leaders of the black community who fail to recognize, or refuse to admit, this is the source of problem. The other night I saw a black college professor being interviewed and the discussion was about the black on white violence and was the recent increase a blow back from the Zimmerman case. The professor said it was not and was as a result of racism. (surprise!) Then the issue of out of wedlock births in the black community was brought up by the host and the professor said that was not the source of the problem as the whites wanted to make it out to be.

If one would look at the background of prisoners, criminals, gang members, and children who get into trouble in school and other places, one would see the vast majority of them were the product of unwed mothers.

The other day I heard about a black lady saying how disappointed she was in her son because he was the father of nine children by nine different women. Folks that is the problem and sticking one's head in the sand will not make it go away.

This situation can be directly tied to LBJ's Great Society and also with the implementation of no-fault divorce. Spin it as liberals may....statistical timelines don't lie.

Fiat_Lux
15901
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Fiat_Lux 09/13/13 - 02:23 pm
2
1
@ LocalGuy55 (7:58am)

Absolutely great comment. Few ever are this clear and on target.

It should be an LTE on its own.

Darby
26885
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Darby 09/13/13 - 04:06 pm
3
2
"Yeah, it's pretty easy to blame single

mothers for every bad thing in our society."

.
As opposed to five straight years of blaming Bush for it all. Sure got a lot of mileage out of that one, didn't we???

Fiat_Lux
15901
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Fiat_Lux 09/13/13 - 04:33 pm
2
1
Specsta, do you actually think

Mr. Smith is BLAMING single moms?

Seriously, Dude?

Go read it again with your mind propped open a crack.

harley_52
23959
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harley_52 09/13/13 - 05:51 pm
2
1
localguy55

Excellent post. You have nailed it.

KSL
134231
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KSL 09/13/13 - 09:43 pm
0
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Specsta says 2 million are in

Specsta says 2 million are in jail, creating single parent families. Yeah, right. Like they are excellent role models.

Darby
26885
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Darby 09/13/13 - 10:43 pm
1
1
"Specsta says 2 million are in jail..."

Probably should be closer to 4 million, but the taxpayers can't afford it!

Young Fred
17860
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Young Fred 09/14/13 - 02:10 am
0
1
The letter writer asks: “Why

The letter writer asks:

“Why won’t The Augusta Chronicle take the lead to publish story after story, day after day, week after week, month after month showing pointed examples of the above real-life situation that is causing problems around our city and our country every day?”

Because even though the AC proclaims they have a conservative editorial staff, they still can't bring themselves to be constantly subject to ridicule and baseless accusations like some commentators made in response to this letter.

Even though they may have the facts on their side when it comes to raising our youth they're just not willing to “put themselves out” like that. Oh they may write an editorial on occasion, but they're not willing to take a chance and highlight the constant and numerous examples of destructiveness to our society.

I suspect a paper is very aware and somewhat skittish when it comes to taking a hard stand that may end up getting them derided and mocked by the “major” players in main-stream media.

The “low-information” types do happen to be very aware of opinions of major media players. And being low-information, they allow those very same major players to form opinions for them.

Of course, if things are ever going to change, someone has to take a stand!

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