Bill Kirby

Online news editor for The Augusta Chronicle.

Down the aisle is out of step

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If heartaches were commercials, we’d all be on TV.

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– John Prine

Ever wonder why there are so many computer dating commercials on television? Well, maybe it’s because the number of married women today is at a historic low.

Bowling Green State Uni­versity’s National Cen­ter for Family and Marriage Re­search recently reported the U.S. marriage rate at about one-third where it was in 1920.

Why? Well, I’m sure if you asked the college professor who teaches marriage classes, she (or he) might suggest the past century has shown a stunning rise in the social, economic and political power of women – a surge in feminine independence.

He (or she) might point out that 1920 was the first year many women in this country were allowed to vote, and since then, things have gradually, grudgingly, grandly changed.

But, if you asked me, I’d blame Hollywood.

As popular media has also exploded in the past century, women have seen men in movies who look like Brad Pitt and George Cloo­ney and Hugh Jackman.

Handsome, strong, handsome, clever, handsome, witty and … well, handsome.

But when they reach a marriageable age and begin to look around for a romantic life partner (or even temporary life partner) they see Larry the Cable Guy. A lot of them, actually.

Then they decide marriage isn’t as high on their list as, let’s say, career fulfilment.

Personally, I foresee grim times in the wedding cake industry.

BASEBALL REMEMBERS: I had a great time Tuesday night at the 30th (and final) Amer­ican Legion baseball reunion at Post 63.

Many of the old players from Richmond County’s diamond glory days made it out, and told stories and ate steak, and told more stories.

It was wonderful.

And it was great to see so many old friends, such as Billy Watkins and Charlie Beale and Lee Sheridan and Lamar Garrard and Jim Whitehead again.

(It was great to hear about a home run White­head hit that apparently has yet to come down.)

Phil Shaefer, the legendary Georgia radio sportscaster and North Augusta High grad, did come down (from Atlanta) and recalled playing against many of the men in the room.

“What great teams you guys had,” he said.

That makes sense, because they were great guys.

Still are.

TODAY’S JOKE: Taxiing down the tarmac, the jetliner abruptly stopped, turned around and returned to the gate. After an hourlong wait, it finally took off.

A concerned passenger asked the flight attendant, “Was there a problem?”

“Oh no,” the flight attendant said, “the pilot was bothered by a noise he heard in the engine, and it took us a while to find a new pilot.”

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corgimom
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corgimom 02/21/14 - 11:26 am
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Women want decent men that

Women want decent men that aren't drunks, druggies, potheads, mentally ill, violent, criminals, and that are willing to work and support a family.

They want men that don't have criminal records, that want to put family first in their lives, and that aren't going to turn their lives into a living Hell on Earth.

And nowadays that's hard to find.

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