Bill Kirby

Online news editor for The Augusta Chronicle.

Lawn Rangers take a break during this wet season

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The simple, compact, well-joined scheme …

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– Leaves of Grass,
Walt Whitman

OK, let’s make a deal.

Nobody will judge a neighbor’s lawn until we get out of the current June monsoon season.

No one will make jungle jokes as they peer into another’s backyard.

And … we all agree not to drive slowly through the neighborhood, pointing at someone else’s verdant overgrowth while shaking our heads disapprovingly.

Got it?

I hope so, because I don’t think I can remember a June that came out of the gate as wet as this one and got damper every day.

According to the chart in the paper, we’re around 8 inches for the month, which is double the average. We’re over for the year as well.

Our lawns are thick, green and growing, and that’s no surprise because the Lord keeps watering them for us almost every day.

That rain is the complicating factor in all this because, first and foremost, it makes the grass grow faster.

Secondly, it makes that grass wet, and wet grass is not something you want to mow. It balls up in the blades and leaves lines of green clumps. It clogs up the underside of your mower, and has to be scraped out – always a wary exercise.

And if you have a bag attachment, well, wet grass weighs a ton and you have to dump it someplace, which can also be an issue.

We are in that lawn care dilemma – you need to cut the grass more often, but can’t cut it often enough.

Normally, you would wait until things dried out … but they don’t seem to want to dry out.

I have consulted (suggested, hinted and harangued) the in-house lawn boy home from college and suggested that a mowed front lawn would make his old parents ever so happy.

He respectfully agrees, but keeps telling me, “It’s too wet today, Dad.”

He’s right, even though I noticed that two afternoon showers only mildly slowed down a golf game he shared with his friends. You might not be able to cut the grass, but you can still play on it.

My little white house dogs agree. They are mildly perplexed that their outdoor playground has become so thick and are unused to grass high enough to tickle their tummies. Actually, they seem to like it.

As for me, I just want it to look good. If I thought I could slip AstroTurf by the homeowners association, I’d consider it. But I can’t, so I just look out the window and watch it grow.

No, really, I think I can see it grow. Try it. Kneel down close to the dark green blades and stare … there … did you see it?

Now, I know all this rain won’t last. I know that in a few weeks, our summer will be as dry as a Baptist picnic. Within a month or two, I imagine, we’ll be running stories in the paper reminding everyone about odd-even watering rules.

But for now, we watch and wait and hope for a longer break between downpours, perhaps just every other day, so we can get these lawns mowed and cut and trimmed to their best-looking of the year.

And when that happens, we can go back to cruising the subdivision and judging each other’s efforts, or lack thereof.

Lawn Rangers … on the job.

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Darby
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Darby 06/24/13 - 12:59 am
1
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I need to cut my grass so I can

find my lawn mower...

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