Bill Kirby

Online news editor for The Augusta Chronicle.

Avoid the rush for sunscreen, sunglasses

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A good laugh is sunshine in the house.

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– William Makepeace Thackeray

I was moving quicker than usual Thursday morning when I headed for the door.

“What’s the rush?” my wife asked.

I pointed to the big headline on our front page about the solar storm headed this way.

“I want to get some sunscreen before they run out,” I said. “Bet there’s a rush.”

She rolled her eyes (as usual).

“And that reminds me,” I said. “I need sunglasses, too.”

ONE MAN, ONE VOTE: My 18-year-old got his first chance at voting Tuesday. We went very early because he had school and a golf match afterward. We got there in time for him to be first in line.

I think he thought this adult voting thing would be a bit more ceremonial, a bit more like CSPAN. Instead he found the usual – a bunch of casually dressed retirees waiting in line in a church fellowship hall.

“That wasn’t too hard,” he said as we walked out afterward.

“No,” I assured him in my best civics teacher voice. “All the work is what you do ahead of time to make sure you make an informed decision.”

KIRBY IN THE HOUSE: Speaking of elections, my first cousin Tom Kirby, of Walton County, won a special runoff Tuesday for a seat in the Georgia Legislature. He will represent the 107th District. (I plan to soon be offering him tips on useful legislation, so if you have any, I’ll share your ideas.)

AND SPEAKING OF SHARING: I exchanged some of my favorite Augusta stories Tuesday night at the regular meeting of the Augusta Richmond County Historical Society. I talked about Beverly Allen’s jail escape and Dorothy Kilgallen’s mysterious death and why Augusta is where it is.

Everyone was very gracious, and I thank them for the opportunity.

TODAY’S JOKE: Billy Cooper, of North Augusta, shares this one.

It seems the Smith family was proud of its past. Its ancestors had come to America on the Mayflower and descendants included lawmakers and Wall Street wizards. They decided to compile a history as a legacy for their children, and hired a fine author.

Only one problem arose, how to handle great-uncle George, the criminal who was executed in the electric chair. However, the author – a skillful writer – said he could handle the story tactfully.

So when the book was published, this is what it said, “George Smith occupied a chair of applied electronics at an important government institution, was attached to his position by the strongest of ties, and his sudden death came as a great shock.”


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