Sylvia Cooper

City Ink columnist and correspondent for The Augusta Chronicle.

Not everyone can take a joke like Freddie Sanders

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I thought all City Ink readers would realize Freddie Sanders’ post-election comments about being rejected by his friends after he lost his bid for sheriff to Richard Roundtree were in jest.

Sanders and Sheriff Ronnie Strength have been close friends for 25 years and tease each other unmercifully, which people who know them know very well. So they both were shocked to receive calls from folks who didn’t realize Sanders was joking even though I intentionally planted a clue when I wrote “he laughed.”

This reminds me of what Don Grantham’s wife, Carol, said years ago when he was on the Augusta Commission. She didn’t like what I’d written about the commissioners and was scolding me. I told her it was just satire, and she said, “People in Au­gusta don’t understand satire.”

Some don’t, but maybe I didn’t make it clear that Sanders is a comedian and Strength is not half-bad himself when he’s not playing the straight man. If I had, though, it would have been like having to explain the punch line of a joke to somebody who doesn’t get it.

TURKEY OF THE YEAR AND SOME OTHER HIGH-FLYING BIRDS: That being said, as bloviating politicians and TV commentators say, we will commence with the Turkey of the Year awards.

We had a flock of nominees this year, some of whom rank high in the pecking order, such as the Georgia Board of Regents, which named Augusta’s new university GRU at the behest of Georgia Health Sciences University President Ricardo Azziz. And there’s Gov. Nathan Deal, who didn’t want to ruffle the board’s feathers by asking them to scratch GRU and choose the name preferred by people far and wide – University of Augusta. Instead, he urged the board and the “Save the A” committee to “compromise,” which turned out to be a face-saving ploy that won’t mean doodley squat.

Therefore, the whole lot of them deserves the Turkey Jerky award.

Barry Paschal, the publisher of the Columbia County News-Times, also nominated Azziz for Turkey of the Year but acknowledged he has one good quality: “He succeeded in doing what virtually no one else has ever been able to do – unite Augustans of all stripes in agreement. We all agree that we detest the GRU name and its Frankenstein creation, GRU-Augusta.”

So Azziz gets the Turkey of the Year award and the Turkey a la King award.

GOBBLERS, HENS AND JAKES: Paschal also nominated 12th Congressional District Republican candidate Lee Anderson for Turkey of the Year.

“I love the man dearly as a person, but he lost a race where all the cards were stacked in his favor, Paschal said. “He helped draw the 12th District to his liking, cutting (John) Barrow and many Democrats out of it (again), and announced his intention to run long before anyone else. He should have been a shoo-in, but he allowed some truly unlikable people to do most of the talking for him, and more and more it began to appear that they were in control instead of the candidate.

“His campaign spent most of its time and money beating up Obama and Bar­row, and did a terrible job telling us who Lee Anderson was – except to make it clear he’d be a rubber-stamp for the Republican leadership, who rewarded him by coming to town and shaking hands with big donors. Meanwhile, Barrow flew above it all and defined himself in such a way that even many long-time Republicans held their noses and voted for him.”

Anderson’s campaign manager, Reagan Williams, and communications director, Ryan Mahoney, get the Turkey Wishbone award because they trussed Anderson up behind closed doors, wishing they could get him elected before somebody asked him about the Federal Reserve again.

U.S. Rep. Paul Broun was nominated for Turkey of the Year for saying evolution and embryology were “lies straight from the pit of hell.” He lost out because even turkeys know they haven’t always been so ugly. So Broun has to settle for the Which Came First, The Turkey or the Egg? award.

Local elections usually result in a few birdbrained incidents, including lots of sign stealing that nobody cares about but the candidate whose signs get damaged or stolen. This year was no different, though a hen and two jakes did get charged with vandalizing Anderson’s signs.

Augusta Commission Dis­trict 7 candidate Donnie Smith, now commissioner-elect, won the Wild Turkey Wing award for responding to a friend’s call for help after a drunken brawl-type incident at Wild Wing Cafe. When Smith, a Georgia State Patrol officer, arrived on the scene, his friend had already been arrested and sat bleeding in the back of a patrol car. What happened next is under dispute. Some who witnessed the brawl and aftermath said Smith tried to intervene on behalf of his friend. Smith said he didn’t and was just trying to help. The arresting officers didn’t say anything.

Latasha Nicole Moore gets the Birds of a Different Feather award for telling sheriff’s investigators that a used-car lot owner approached her at a Round­tree event and promised her a car if she got four people to vote for Roundtree. She said she held up her end of the bargain but the car lot owner wouldn’t. So Moore, who was very familiar with the law having had numerous run-ins with it herself, called the sheriff’s office to complain.

When the car lot owner’s wife heard Moore’s allegations, she declared, “This girl is crazy,” and took out a warrant for her. Moore didn’t show up for court and was arrested. So she gets the Penned-Up Turkey award.

Richmond County Sheriff-elect Roundtree gets the Turkey Strut award for having a black-tie inaugural ball to celebrate his win.

Augusta Commissioner-elect Marion Williams, crowned Turkey of the Year Emeritus In Perpetuity before leaving the commission in 2008, loses that but receives the Leftover Turkey award for reappearing just in time for Thanksgiving.

City Administrator Fred Russell and Augusta commissioners, except for Jerry Brigham and Grady Smith, get the Chopping Block award for firing longtime recreation director Tom Beck a couple of years short of full retirement on a time-card fraud allegation. Beck worked in the recreation department for 35 years and never even drank a free Coca-Cola, much less commit fraud, and they know it.

Richmond County Demo­cra­tic Party Chairman Lowell Greenbaum and the executive committee that scratched a retirement reception for Strength because he endorsed Repub­lican Sanders were nominated for the Turkey of the Year award, but they’ll have to settle for the Half Baked Turkey award. Greenbaum was nominated for Turkey of the Year in 2005, and when notified, asked, “What do I win? Do I get a turkey?”

Finally, there are no turkeys among the 18 prominent Augustans and their wives who are holding a reception honoring Strength at the Milledge Road home of businessman Rodger Giles next month. Just residents who appreciate Strength’s 27 years of service.

I GUESS NO DEMOCRATS WILL BE ABLE TO APPLY: Some applications for free turkeys at the annual James Brown Turkey Giveaway will be taken Monday. Recipients must provide a valid state ID and proof of address, such as a utility bill or lease statement.

Somehow I find that humorous.

Comments (33) Add comment
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seenitB4
79295
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seenitB4 11/17/12 - 07:38 pm
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3
I do too Sylvia...:)

Recipients must provide a valid state ID and proof of address, such as a utility bill or lease statement.

Somehow I find that humorous.

gargoyle
12567
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gargoyle 11/17/12 - 08:32 pm
7
5
Needy Disfranchisement

"Recipients must provide a valid state ID and proof of address, such as a utility bill or lease statement". This will make it to the high courts, free stuff should be free for everyone. Where's the outrage, so what if some get to go through the line multiple times thats the price you pay to make things fair.

KSL
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KSL 11/17/12 - 09:37 pm
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It's not so hard to get that

It's not so hard to get that ID when it allows one to be on the receiving end of something, so it seems.

jwilliams
688
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jwilliams 11/17/12 - 11:16 pm
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1
Runoff Election 12/4/2012

District 1 Run off December 4, 2012
Is it me or has anyone else noticed how the Chronicle and now Sylvia, are not mentioning much about the upcoming December 4, 2012 runoff election between the incumbent, Matt “Tee Center” Aitken and challenger William “Bill” Fennoy? I wonder why? If I did not know any better, I would think that they were thinking if they kept quiet, the 60% of neglected district 1 voters that asked for change on 11/6/2012 would forget to come back out for the run off.
Reference: 60% of district 1 voters that asked for change. Augusta Richmond County Board of Elections, on 11/6/2012

allhans
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allhans 11/17/12 - 11:20 pm
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Hopefully the SCOTUS will do

Hopefully the SCOTUS will do as promised and settle the ID (voter) matter in the coming year.

KSL
118664
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KSL 11/17/12 - 11:33 pm
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5
Hopefully before Obama gets

Hopefully before Obama gets to appoint.

F4therTime
4656
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F4therTime 11/17/12 - 11:34 pm
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Actually...
Unpublished

As far as the runoff goes...nobody cares because the one in office isn't worth a vote and the one running against him isn't a whole lot better. Politics as usual in Augusta. The way it is set up (by Walker and Williams) is to keep it stagnated. Why even have a Mayor? Consolidation has always been a ploy to make the rest of Augusta pay for downtown pork. It has never worked for the good of anyone but the old city.

shrimp for breakfast
5407
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shrimp for breakfast 11/17/12 - 11:34 pm
5
9
I understand the sherrif's race.

Richmond county is democratic and I think the white people thought that Peebles would win by a landslide and many didn't bother to vote. The republican stood no chance running against a democrat.
It's time to get behind Sherrif Roundtree and help him in any way we can. I know I will'

Little Lamb
43370
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Little Lamb 11/17/12 - 11:41 pm
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3
Sugar Ray

jwilliams posted:

Is it me or has anyone else noticed how . . . Sylvia [is] not mentioning much about the upcoming . . . runoff election between the incumbent, Matt “Tee Center” Aitken and challenger William “Bill” Fennoy?

You should refer to the challenger as William “Sugar Ray” Fennoy.

:-)

Little Lamb
43370
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Little Lamb 11/17/12 - 11:48 pm
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1
Androgeny

I thought it was two hens and one jake who vandalized the Anderson/Romney signs. The older hen was the ringleader, and the younger hen was androgynous to the point that her picture confused Sylvia.

galaxygrl
1165
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galaxygrl 11/18/12 - 12:13 am
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Turkeys

No bones to pick here. :-)

jwilliams
688
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jwilliams 11/18/12 - 12:34 am
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Sugar Ray

Posted by Little Lamb:
You should refer to the challenger as William “Sugar Ray” Fennoy.
Hello Little Lamb, please clarify what you mean by referring to William “Bill” Fennoy as Sugar Ray.

F4therTime
4656
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F4therTime 11/18/12 - 12:43 am
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He is talking about
Unpublished

the fight between Fennoy and Woody Merry...

jwilliams
688
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jwilliams 11/18/12 - 01:09 am
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Oh, do you mean this,

Oh, do you mean this, “Witnesses said Merry pushed Fennoy, and Fennoy came back, knocking Merry to the ground” (ABC 6 WJBF-TV, Published: June 27, 2008 ). Taken from ABC 6 WJBF TV, Augusta Coliseum Authority member Bill Fennoy has been cleared for his part in the fight with activist Woody Merry before a meeting in May. Fennoy say he's happy it's all over. As part of the settlement, Merry is supposed to write a letter of apology to Fennoy, and the entire Augusta Coliseum Authority, and he must promise not to disrupt a private meeting in Augusta, for one year. I may not condone the act, but it sounds like self defense to me and the judge also evidently. Now that we have that out of the way, let’s move forward to coin a phrase by Matt Aitken.
Taken from an article by Susan McCord submitted in the Augusta Chronicle on 11/2/2012
“A graduate of Leadership Augusta with the financial backing of the city’s white power brokers, Aitken said he has campaigned on moving the city forward, especially when it comes to construction projects such as the Augusta Convention Center, also known as the TEE Center, and expanding downtown events.”
I repeat 3 years later, and the gaps are still there in the form of flooding, deterioration of the infrastructure, dilapidated homes, crime and the lack of an adequate transit system. I guess since ALL these problems aren’t affecting the “city’s white power brokers” (Augusta Chronicle, 2012), its plain to see why the forward movement of the city has not occurred in East Augusta, Marion Homes, Sand Hill, Harrisburg and Cherry Tree Crossing. And oh by the way, I guess none of the 30 some employees that were laid off would be a part of the “city’s white power brokers” (Augusta Chronicle, 2012.)
You may assume and make accusations about Mr. Fennoy not being trusted or liked, but it is an actual, self proven fact, and it is also obvious that Aitken is clueless on many of the items that come before the commission. If there is one glaring example of this it is the budget that was hurriedly passed last fall. Aitken voted for the budget, not realizing it contained over 30 lay-offs. He was even under the impression that it contained raises. Had Mr. Aitken even bothered to read key elements of the budget before voting on it? Apparently not. Isn't that the job of a commissioner? To know what he is voting on? If you do not believe me go to You Tube and pull up, “Matt Aitken Deer in Headlights Moment (WRDW News 12)” and let him tell you himself how clueless he is.

F4therTime
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F4therTime 11/18/12 - 01:29 am
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Like I said...
Unpublished

Neither is a great choice and it doesn't matter anyway...the money brokers downtown get their way...see the TEE center and parking deck fiasco and the selling of votes by Betty Beard which should have been deemed illegal. SSDD in augusta politics.

jwilliams
688
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jwilliams 11/18/12 - 01:51 am
1
7
It does matter to the

It does matter to the neglected citizens of Marion Homes, Harrisburg, East Augusta, Apple Valley, Sand Hill and many other areas throughout district 1, that face flooding, deterioration of the infrastructure, dilapidated homes, crime and the lack of an adequate transit system. It matters so much, that 60% of them said that they wanted change on 11/6/2012. So citizens of district 1 get involved and go back to the polls and let’s make change happen.

Bacon Grease
261
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Bacon Grease 11/18/12 - 06:20 am
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3
Augusta is a backed up septic tank.

Augusta is just like a backed up septic tank and so is the white house. The people who are on the government dole are voting these clowns in office and we will go the route of Greece and other socialist countries if something doesn’t change. Better start stocking up on ammo!

LillyfromtheMills
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LillyfromtheMills 11/18/12 - 07:58 am
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Sylvia

Are you having any of these turkey's for dinner?

seenitB4
79295
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seenitB4 11/18/12 - 08:24 am
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Not everyone can take a joke like Freddie Sanders

Not everyone is as wise as Freddie Sanders either...:)

KSL
118664
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KSL 11/18/12 - 09:15 am
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1
I thought he was making the

I thought he was making the joke, not taking the joke.

HenryWalker3rd
2393
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HenryWalker3rd 11/18/12 - 09:50 am
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I never understood the
Unpublished

I never understood the problem with giving away a free turkey to those that are less fortunate...this has been going on for over 20 years....what do YOU do to personally help the less fortunate?

This program has even been extended to the Atlanta Metro area.

Whats the big deal?

http://chronicle.augusta.com/life/your-faith/2012-11-17/bridge-ministry-...

KSL
118664
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KSL 11/18/12 - 09:58 am
4
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Who is complaining about

Who is complaining about giving away turkeys? I missed that!

Riverman1
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Riverman1 11/18/12 - 09:53 am
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I Tried to Tell Um

"Some don’t, but maybe I didn’t make it clear that Sanders is a comedian and Strength is not half-bad himself when he’s not playing the straight man. If I had, though, it would have been like having to explain the punch line of a joke to somebody who doesn’t get it."

Heh, heh, heh...I tried to point out it was satire and was told the truth is often said in jest. It was almost like many wanted the jokes to be the truth. Freddie is a funny, self-effacing guy. On the other hand some other local losing candidates were not in such a good frame of mind.

JRC2024
7722
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JRC2024 11/18/12 - 10:10 am
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jwilliams, If they want

jwilliams, If they want change let the citizens of Marion Homes, Harrisburg, East Augusta, Apple Valley, and Sand Hill do something for themselves instead of waiting on others to do it for them. Let them clean up their yards, fix up their houses and tell the police who the drug dealers are so they can be arrested. They need to stop sitting on the porches, hanging out at the corners and just doing nothing. Ride thru the areas and you will see what I mean. It is not the taxpayers responsibility to take care of them and I resent it as do many many others. Many of us keep our own property clean and in good repair or pay someone else to do it and they should too. Those that live in public housing like Cherry Tree and Marion Homes could also help with the cleanup or just take good care of what they are GIVEN FOR FREE.

Riverman1
78406
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Riverman1 11/18/12 - 10:19 am
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ID Checker At Door

We need a satire ID card checker at the door before you can be admitted to City Ink.

Johnny Hensley
42
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Johnny Hensley 11/18/12 - 10:26 am
3
4
Freddie Sanders

I felt it bazaar that so many of Freddie's friends had "turned" on him over a political race, but stranger things have happened in Augusta politics...which I do not like. No matter what you do you're going to make someone mad. I really like Freddie even though I'm not at the top of his social register. I'll tell Freddie what I heard my former father-in-law Danny Philpot, tell Jim Beck, who wanted to run for Sheriff, life-long friend of Beck, Philpot, had announced to support Charlie Webster, Whom I had never heard of at the time. My friend Beck was livid with my father-in-law. I heard Danny tell him. "Beck, we've been friends all our lives, and you say you're not MY friend anymore. Well, I'm still YOURS...and there ain't a damn thing you can do about". I'm still yours Freddie...ain't a damn thing you can do about it. Johnny Hensley

soapy_725
43527
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soapy_725 11/18/12 - 11:11 am
0
0
What an ego, Johnny?
Unpublished

Singed your name in two places. Does you car have your name on it? I remember when you sang on the alter at church on Olive Rd. Wow. Another Huckabee. Always knew he was destined for stardom. Tammy Faye as well. She was born to be on TV, so she said.

jwilliams
688
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jwilliams 11/18/12 - 11:36 am
1
3
Hello JRC2024

Source: Richmond County sheriff proud of his office, Strength proud of his office By Summer Moore Staff Writer Sunday, Jan. 1, 2012
Hello JRC2024, are you saying that everyone in Cherry Tree is bad? That’s not what the top law enforcement officer Sheriff Strength said on 1/1/2012, “Not everyone in Cherry Tree is a bad person. We have a lot of good people who live there too, and they want us there.” I have always wondered why people assume that if someone lives in public assistance that they are not taxpayers. There are many people that live in Cherry Tree Crossing that pay their fair share of taxes (so what are they getting free), just as well as a few that do not, but that is across this county, state, and nation in ALL walks of life; economically and socially and it is probably more than 47%. And oh by the way, Marion Homes is not public housing.

omnomnom
3964
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omnomnom 11/18/12 - 11:37 am
2
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I would've thought Nick Evans

I would've thought Nick Evans and the Save the A campaign warranted a turncoat turkey, or are they just playing possum? or did Augusta get played again?

Oh well.

Willow Bailey
20579
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Willow Bailey 11/18/12 - 12:23 pm
4
1
Nick's no turkey....

Many may not like the outcome of Nick Evan's endeavor in the "Save the A campaign". Prior to voicing my complaint though, I should ask myself, what did "I DO" for this worthy cause? The answer may surprise you. Gobble, gobble.(That's not aimed at you omnomnom.)

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