My 2010 census form has been completed and mailed off, so nobody needs to count on me for another decade.

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By then, I will no doubt be living in the Home for the Chronically Drooling, sharing a semiprivate room with a grizzled old veteran of the invasion of Grenada, who will keep me awake at night with his war stories of "those 52 grueling days that saved the Union."

Like me, you probably found the census form a breeze, much easier for us to fill in the blanks than it will be for the census workers to carry to completion.

True to form, however, it was a bit complicated for me. I originate in the foothills, and the Census Bureau must be under the impression I am only visiting here on vacation and am still living off that dirt road back in the woods; it sent me a special version of the form.

Most of you were asked 10 easy things such as your name, age, race and size of household. Here are some of the additional questions that were on my form:

11. Do you or any member of your family operate an illegal still for making untaxed liquor?

12. Are you sure, boy?

13. We're serious. We know you have relatives who live so far back in the hills that we haven't been able to count them for 233 years. Want to tell us about them? Please be thorough.

14. What is the term you normally use for federal officers? a. federal officers; b. hired guns; c. guvmint revenoors.

15. Would you consider accepting a cash payment from us for turning in any of your kin who make moonshine?

16. Can you tell us the names of any relatives we could pay to turn you in? Please be thorough.

17. Do you consider NASCAR races just a fortuitous sideline of the cars' main function?

18. Are any of your vehicles equipped with large storage tanks not meant for fuel?

19. Can you sing the words to the Thunder Road theme song?

20. Catch you later, OK?

SERIOUSLY, FOLKS, I hope you have already helped the Census Bureau in its efforts to count you, because that information will decide how you are represented in Congress. Also, they use your responses to work out a lot of statistics that will be handy for years to come. Don't treat the census folks like guvmint revenoors.

My question No. 20 brings back memories. I used to work in a county where the sheriff had been born in the jail because his father was sheriff at the time.

Though he was born into the job, the sheriff was mild-mannered, low-key and polite -- more Sheriff Andy Taylor than Sheriff Buford Pusser. After interviewing him for a news story, I would thank him and prepare to leave his office.

His final words to me were always: "Catch you later."

I was pure of heart, of course, but those words from the county's top constitutional officer never failed to send a shudder through me as I walked out the door. Was he kidding me, or tipping me off?

GOODBYE, DAVY AND DAN'L: Do you have memories of the roles played by actor Fess Parker, who died last week?

Add your comments to my memories about growing up with Davy Crockett and Daniel Boone at my blog, Moore or Less.