You can hit a 2-acre fairway 10 percent of the time and a 2-inch branch 90 percent of the time.
– Golf observation
Early spring and recent rain mean things are turning green fast on my street.
That’s bad news for our son, the teenage yardboy, but good news for his mother and me, who can now sit out back in relative privacy surrounded by leafy, green trees.
It hasn’t been that way since fall when the leaves did.
Without the leaves, we got to scan the dozens of three-story apartment buildings that went up a few years ago, replacing what had been acres of woods with looming rows of balconies.
Someone suggested I sit out back with binoculars like Jimmy Stewart in the Hitchcock movie, watching my neighbors and writing columns about my observations of their lives.
But I think that’s illegal. Or at least creepy.
Now I don’t have to.
THANKS: To Shirley Holgate, of North Augusta, who sent me a sweet magazine article on the benefits of dogs.
(I read it to my two, Shirley, and they wagged their tails.)
VOTE NOTES: Jimmy Smith asked me to get the word out. Lynn Bailey, the director of the Richmond County Board of Elections, will speak tonight to the regular meeting of Pride and Progress at 7 p.m. at University Medical Center South, 3121 Peach Orchard Road.
SEASON NEAR: I have to work this week, but I wish I was with “Frank, George, Jim, Eddie, Bob, David and Gene” who sent this note: “Seven of us are off on our annual trip to spring training ... Plan to see the Braves, Phillies, Tigers, Mets, Yankees, Marlins, Orioles, Red Sox and Pirates plus some minor leaguers in the next week.”
My wife says I can go ... just not this year.
Probably not next year, either.
In fact, it might be a while.
TODAY’S JOKE: Here’s one shared by Seth Benson, of Millen.
A blackjack dealer and a player with a 13-count in his hand were arguing about whether or not it was appropriate to tip the dealer.
The player said, “When I get bad cards, it’s not the dealer’s fault. And, when I get good cards, the dealer obviously has nothing to do with it. So, why should I tip him?”
The dealer replied, “When you eat out, do you tip the waiter?”
“Yes, sure I do,” responded the player.
“Well then, he serves you food, and I’m serving you cards. So you see, you should tip me.”
“OK, I see your point,” agreed the player. “But, the waiter gives me what I ask for ... I’ll take an eight.”