Maybe it's just me, but I woke up so happy this morning realizing that the war on terror is over now that we have the "overseas contingency operation," and now we no longer have to fear acts of terror.
If someone blows up Savannah River Site or Plant Vogtle, the smell of death and disaster will not be nearly so unpleasant knowing that it was caused not by terrorism but by a "man-made disaster." By the way, can we go ahead and change that to "person-made disasters" so as not to offend any political insensitivities?
I have eliminated my mortgage payment and my income taxes; they are now to be referred to as my "monthly financial institution contribution" and my "annual patriotic monetary contribution." respectively. While I'm at it, we could change the name of abortion to " inconvenient life resolution," and racists to "American pigmentation differentiation societies."
Thank you, Mr. Obama, for giving us this wonderful change. Gosh, I feel so much better. Now if I could just come up with a new name for in-laws.