Not Greg Tracy.
The 22-year-old soldier, stationed at Hunter Army Airfield, spent an hour standing at the corner of Ga. 204 and King George Boulevard on Sunday afternoon as part of his quest to get his girlfriend to forgive him for being unfaithful.
He wore a Scooby Doo hat and carried a large sign, decorated with balloons, that outed him as a "dog" and a cheater. His handmade sign also pointed out he "lost an amazing girlfriend."
"I lied and cheated," said Tracy. "I have a list of things I have to do to win her back."
The path toward forgiveness comes with six steps. In addition to standing outside with his sign, he also:
-- Called a local radio station, explained what he did wrong and admitted he lied to her, and dedicated a song to his love.
-- Made a timeline of things he remembers about her that are special.
-- Gave her the passwords to his e-mail account, as well as his Facebook and MySpace pages.
-- Must make a YouTube video about why he's doing all this.
So far, she has yet to reveal the sixth and final task to him.
While Tracy stood on the street corner Sunday, some people yelled at him from their vehicles, some stopped to talk to him and take pictures, and one guy threw a drink at him. As far as he knows, his girlfriend was not among those who saw him.
He seems to be learning his lesson, and has advice for others.
"She's a smart girl," he said of his girlfriend. "Eventually it's going to come out.
"Don't lie. Don't cheat. This is not fun."